In fact, New Donk City might be the single biggest power drain in the Mario universe. They must have millions of moons just waiting in storage below the city.
So are all of Mario’s collectibles the same, and if so, could you use these moons to cast the same enchantments that were cast in Super Mario 64? Could you bring paintings to life and trap people inside them? Does this mean that New Donk City, which runs on a generator that needs to be fed a constant supply of power moons, is a city powered by magic?įor that matter, what happens to those Power Moons once they are drained of energy? Are they just discarded? Do they eventually recharge? Heck, why didn’t Mayor Pauline just give Mario the Power Moons he needed to get the Odyssey to fly directly to Bowser? New Donk City consumes moons at a rate faster than one moon per second. The game even references them as Power Moons, and when you put them into the Odyssey, they appear as moons, not stars. However, Cappy says that they are exactly the same thing. When Mario visits the Mushroom Kingdom, he is able to find Power Stars instead of Power Moons. This is perhaps the least disturbing question that I’ll be asking today. Maybe then we can sleep at night after the horrors we have seen.
So before you go hand-waving away all the crazy theories about Mario’s strangely controversial nipples, maybe you can answer these pressing questions. Now you have me questioning what death or sentience even means in Mario’s world! Maybe you don’t even realize what a screwed up universe you have created. No, I’m going to put on even more tin-foil! I’m going to make a tin-foil suit of armor and plaster it to my body with cling wrap just to be sure, because while you may have clearly pointed out that Mario is a human, not a hat, you forgot that Super Mario Odyssey brings up so many other questions about the Mario universe. But I’m not ready to take off this tin-foil hat just yet. You imagine they’re all dead, now.Fine Nintendo! You win! Mario isn’t his own hat. You flee, but not before watching the maniac stomp on two of those fine young men.
Suddenly, a figure pops out of the top Goomba and snatches the Moon you just offered in the name of love! To your horror, you realize that it’s the mustachioed serial killer who has seemingly possessed your suitors. To complete this bizarre ritual, you offer your Power Moon (again, ignoring) as a token of your gratitude. Overwhelmed by your sudden popularity, you offer your affection completely to these suitors, accompanied by a fanfare of heart bubbles and rosy firework animations (we’ll just ignore the possible sexual implications here). Then, to your pleasant surprise, you see not one, not two, but seven Goombas approaching you, all stacked on top of each other in some absurd, quasi-phallic display of masculinity. News of a short Italian guy out on a murder spree keeps you on edge, but you can’t help feeling that today might hold the fortuitous meeting of you and your true love. Picture this from Goombette’s perspective: you’re sitting around, enjoying the sun with your sun hat on, wondering if perhaps you’ll be noticed by some handsome young shroom. But the charm wore off once I made a more keen observation of what was actually happening in these scenarios. It initially comes off as quite romantic decades of squashing Goombas can have a sick, masochistic way of endearing one to the grumpy little dudes, so it’s nice to see them find true love in this war of violent ground-pounds and mind-control.
Ostensibly overcome with infatuation at the sight of a strapping young mushroom-shaped lad, Goombette then relinquishes a Moon to Mario in disguise. In order to attain the Moon she holds, one must Capture one or more Goombas and make their way towards Goombette. The trouble is Goombette seems terrified of Mario and will rush off into thin air at the sight of him. While some Moons are awarded after defeating bosses-and others are just lying around, almost unimportantly-there is always one in each Kingdom held by Goombette, a feminine pink Goomba in a large summer hat. Super Mario Odyssey is a phenomenal platformer brimming with purple coins and Power Moons to be found and collected. I especially appreciate each Kingdom’s Goombette puzzles but as I have come across more of these encounters, I have grown increasingly disturbed by the dark, twisted implications behind them. The longer I play, the more interesting the puzzles and obstacles seem to become. I have been playing Super Mario Odyssey regularly since its release last month, and I have yet to grow tired of the seemingly endless hunt for Power Moons.